25 Absolutely Ridiculous Items Auctioned Off On eBay - #23 Will Stun You!

Jay Dawson December 15th 2016 Humor
Christmas shopping is always tough this time of year. Time’s running out, and you still haven’t got your loved ones that perfect, unique gift. If you’re still scratching your head, and you got them a pony last year, you might want to consider eBay. The auction website has seen a bunch of truly strange things up for sale over the years, from possessed bath toys to Hollywood icons. So if you’re looking for inspiration, check out our list of some of the best and strangest things that have ever been up for sale.

1. Britney Spears's Hair

The internet is full of people looking for a quick buck. And when Britney had her mini-meltdown back in 2007, shaving off her luscious locks, the owner of the Californian salon where it happened thought they were on to a guaranteed winner. They put the hair up for a cool $1m (as well as some half-drunk Red Bull and a lighter), but sadly eBay pulled the auction before it went too far.

2. A 10-Year-Old Half-Eaten Sandwich

Sold for a staggering $28,000, this was no ordinary grilled cheese sandwich. The owner had stopped eating it at the time when he discovered that there was an image of the Virgin Mary grilled into the bread. 10 years later, he decided to put it up for auction, and the rest is disgusting and very unsanitary history.

3. A Liver

Here’s one way to beat the organ traffickers: sell off your body parts before they do. That’s what a man in Florida thought when he listed his own liver for an insane $5.7m. Although it does raise the question: don’t you need that thing? Apparently eBay thought so too, and canceled the auction just as he was preparing the ice bath.

4. His Life

Most of us have had a terrible day (or three), so we can totally understand Ian Usher when a really, really terrible one (his wife left him) made him decide to put his life up for auction. Everything must go, etc. The auction changed his life forever when he made $300,000, traveled the world, and became a bestselling author and speaker. We’re betting he didn’t regret that sale.

5. Water Left By Elvis Presley

Some fans will do anything for a piece of The King. One item in particular, a plastic cup that contained a small amount of undrunk water from a 1977 concert in North Carolina, went for $455 to a particularly gullible fan. Really, how had the water not evaporated? Who had kept that cup the whole time? The facts really are hard to swallow.

6. A Single Cornflake

And not even a special cornflake (unlike snowflakes, they’re not unique). Just a cornflake. Browny-orange, mass produced, and probably stale. A student from the UK, either very desperate or very bored, ended up selling it for just under $2. Hopefully he was a wise businessman and invested in a whole new box.

7. A Demonic Rubber Duck

Reportedly filled with evil powers, the description for this otherwise average looking bath-time toy said that it had possessed his child, and that his child would “throw the duck as far away from his as he could whenever he got the chance”. We don’t know who’s buying creepy, possessed toys off eBay – someone who’s never seen Child’s Play, that’s for sure – but it sold for over $100.

8. Unwanted Brussels Sprout

Surprisingly, the seller of the unwanted brussels sprout wasn’t a cranky four-year-old, but in fact a mother from the UK who had leftovers from Christmas dinner. Incredibly, it pulled in a whopping $2,000 in bids. Don’t tell the kids that they can profit from not eating their greens.

9. A New Species

Selling rare sea animals is a dodgy trade at the best of times, but in this case it worked out pretty well. An unknown seller put up a strange sea urchin on eBay which was snapped up by an eagle-eyed marine biologist. Turns out it was a completely new species, later labelled Coelopleurus exquisitus.

10. The Meaning Of Life

Put up for auction by a North Carolinian, it sadly didn’t sell for $42 but a measly $3.26. But if you think about it that’s far less than Deepak Chopra would charge – or most religions, for that matter. The successful bidder has never divulged to secret and has since mysteriously vanished. Probably to the Bahamas.

11. The Hollywood Sign

We all know that everything in Hollywood is available for a price, but for some reason we thought that the famous sign in the hills was sacred. Not so, it seems, since the original sign (it was replaced in 1978) fetched a miniscule $450,400 in 2005. That’s about 0.01% of the budget of an average Michael Bay film.

12. A Cheater's Sports Car

In one of the best revenge schemes we’ve ever heard of, British radio personality Tim Shaw’s Lotus Esprit was auctioned off to the quickest finger for 50 cents. By his wife. After listening to him flirt with callers on-air, she got (understandably) a little upset and decided to teach him a lesson. And who said no-one wins in an affair?

13. Pope Benedict XVI's Volkswagen

When Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger was divinely elected as the pope in 2005, he got all the benefits – including a very cool bulletproof Popemobile. No wonder he decided to ditch his old car, a Volkswagen Golf - it couldn’t even protect the environment, let alone his Holiness’s body. It sold for $277,171.12, although running on holy water would make the operating costs devilishly high.

14. New Zealand

Yep, the entire country. The trans-Tasman rivalry was taken to new heights when an Australian man attempted to sell off an “unwanted” New Zealand, starting bidding at a single cent. Before the auction was shut down, it had reached $3,000. In most Australians’ opinion, far more than it’s worth.

15. Her Forehead

Advertising got taken to a whole new level when Kari Smith sold space on her forehead for some permanent advertising. We’re all walking brand advertisements anyway, so what’s the big deal? She made good money, too, finally inking GoldenPalace.com on her head for $10,000. They’re still operating, so it looks like everyone’s a winner.

16. Iceland

When Iceland had its own financial meltdown in 2008, almost overnight the country went from being one of the richest in the world to practically worthless. In the fire sale that ensued, one disgruntled member of the public decided to put the entire nation up for grabs. Which made a lot more financial sense than most of the country’s banks, although no-one bid for it.

17. The Indiana Firebirds Football Team

Ever wanted to own your own sports team, but don’t know where to start? Well, have a browse through eBay and you might find a bargain. Going bankrupt in 2004, the Indiana Firebirds Arena Football team put themselves up to the highest bidder and fetched close to $4 million. It seems that the buyer didn’t know what to do with the new purchase, though, as they’ve never appeared back on the field.

18. The German Language

Oh, those silly Germans, always complaining when things don’t go their way. Upset with the proliferation of English in Germany, The German Language Association put their entire language up for sale as a snide dig. Clearly no-one bought that outdated thing, oder wir alle würden es sprechen.

19. F/A-18 Hornet

Imagine searching through a scrapyard and digging up a fighter jet. That’s what happened to Mike Landa, who picked up a decommissioned F/A-18 Hornet and promptly put it up for megabucks on eBay. The FBI – clearly jealous of his idea – soon got involved, telling him he could only sell it to a US national and that it couldn’t leave the country. Hey G-men: if you love it, let it go.

20. A GIF

If internet people found a way to sell their terrible gifs, we’d all be in trouble. Michael Green tried by making one of Jeff Koons’s Balloon Dog, which at $58 million is the most expensive work ever sold by a living artist. The gif didn’t rate quite so high, only making Green $200. Should have put in more cats.

21. Snake Ingested Golf Balls

Clearly hoping for some mystical help with their game, one avid golfer coughed up $1,400 for four golf balls which had been eaten by a python in Australia, then surgically removed. It seemed like a reasonable investment at the time, but they soon found that the golf balls spent most of their time laying around in the sun and chasing mice.

22. A Good Time

Charity auctions the world over will auction off a night with this or that celebrity, but rarely do you see four big Aussie men up for grabs. Offering “beer, snacks, and good conversation” over a whole weekend, the guys eventually sold themselves for just over a grand. To either a lucky lad or one terrified lady.

23. An Aircraft Carrier

Listed in 2004, the Brazilian aircraft carrier Minas Gerais was up for auction for a few days before eBay shut the whole thing down. It’s unclear why it wasn’t a valid sale – maybe the shipping costs were through the roof. Looking back now, though, Brazil could really have used the money.

24. A Middle Name

Most of us have embarrassing and useless middle names that we’d all be happy to get rid of. We don’t know what Matt Rouse’s was (Flagellate? Aloysius? Bambi?) but he was willing to change it to “LucaHost.com” for a very tidy $8,000. Only problem was, the courts refused to let him go through with the name change. Why make him suffer so much?

25. A Ghost

Sick and tired of being haunted, but can’t find someone to take those pesky phantoms off you? Try eBay, where anything sells. Well, anything except ghosts, sadly – after Michael Fawcett put one up for auction in 2010, they shut it down. Shame, really, as we’re betting it had free shipping.

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